Much meaning can be conveyed, clearly, with our eyes, so it is often said that eyes can speak. Do you have such kind of experience? In a bus you may look at stranger, but not too long. And if he is sensing that he is being stared at, he may feel uncomfortable. The same in daily life. If you are looked at for more than necessary, you will look at yourself up and down, to see if there is anything wrong with you. If nothing goes wrong, you will feel angry toward other’s stare with you that way. Eyes do speak, right? Looking too long at someone may seem to be rude and aggressive. But things are different when it comes to stare at the opposite sex. If a man glances at a woman for more than 10 seconds and refuses to avert his gaze, his intentions are obvious, that is, he wishes to attract her attention, to make her understand that he is admiring her. However, the normal eye contact for two people engaged in conversation is that the speaker will only look at the listener from time to time, in order to make sure that the listener does pay attention to what the former is speaking, to tell him that he is attentive. If a speaker looks at you continuously when speaking, as if he tries to dominate you, you will feel disconcerted. A poor liar usually exposes himself by looking too long at the victim, since he believes in the false idea that to look straight in the eye is a sign of honest communication. Quite the contrary. In fact, continuous eye contact is confined to lovers only, who will enjoy looking at each other tenderly for a long time, to show affection that words cannot express. Evidently, eye contact should be done according to the relationship between two people and the specific situation. | 我们的眼睛能准确地传达一些信息,所以人们常说,眼睛会说话。 你有过类似的体验吗?在公共汽车上,你可能会看着一个陌生人,但时间不会太长。而且,如果他能感觉到有人盯着他,会觉得浑身不自在。 日常生活中亦如此。如果别人一直盯着你看,你就会不由自主地审视自己,看看是不是有什么地方弄错了。如果一切正常,你就会对别人的这种盯梢很气愤。眼睛确实能说话,不是吗? 过久的盯着别人看会给人一种粗鲁和侵犯的感觉。但异性之间的凝视就不同了。如果一个男人盯着一个女人超过10秒钟,还不想挪开视线的话,他的意思就十分明显了,他想引起她的注意,想让她知道他爱慕她。 正常情况下,两人交谈时,目光接触能传达这样的意思:说者偶尔看看听者,以此确认听着是否在认真倾听。而对于听者来说,他会一直看着说话的人,以此告诉他,自己正专心致志的听着。 假如与你说话的那个人直直的盯着你,好像要镇住你似的,你便会感到惶恐不安。一般地,说谎者往往就是看别人的时间过长,而令人起疑。因为他们以为直视别人的眼睛是诚实沟通的表现,结果恰恰相反。 实际上,长时间的相互凝视仅适合情人之间,他们喜欢温柔的对视,用目光来传达言语无法表达的爱意。 显然,目光交流应该根据双方的关系和特定场合来进行。 |
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