Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho.
Husband:It's okey. To my investigation, all Thespeopleeat meals.
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作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-5 11:25
本帖最后由 皮皮鲁 于 2011-4-5 11:26 编辑
"Excuse me,but the seat you've taken is mine."
"Yours?Can you prove it?"
"Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it."
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作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-5 11:31
超级委婉的老板 One of the most tactful men he ever knew”,a California manufacturer says,“was the man who fired me from my very first job.He called me in and said,‘son,I don’t know how we’ve ever going to get along without you,but starting Monday we’re going to try.’”
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作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-5 11:34
When we got our long-distance phone bill,we found that our daughter,Cathy,had been making 60-minute calls to a boyfriend away at college.“From now on,”her father said firmly,“Your calls are limited to five minutes.”
“Dad,what can I say in five minutes?” Cathy wailed.
“Call me back,”he answered.
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作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-7 14:57
Einstein and God
Einstein climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God. Looking up, he asks the Lord..."God, what does a million years mean to you?" The Lord replies, "A minute." "Einstein asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?" The Lord replies, "A penny." Einstein asks, "Can I have a penny?" The Lord replies, "In a minute.
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作者: kobe 时间: 2011-4-7 18:31
great! you did a good job!作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-7 20:49
hehe,thank you for coming!作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-7 21:00
Count to one Hundred Before You Speak
In class,the teacher,with his back leaning against the stove,said to the students,"Before you speak,you should think and count to at least 50,and for important matters to 100."
No sooner had the teacher stopped talking than the students began to count.
at last all the students shouted together,"1...98,99,100.teacher,your clothes are on fire."
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作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-7 21:03
A Mistake
An American, a Scot and a Canadian were killed in a car accident. They arrived at the gates of heaven, where a flustered St. Peter explained that there had been a mistake. "Give me $500 each," he said, "and I'll return you to earth as if the whole thing never happened."
"Done!" said the American. Instantly, he found himself standing unhurt near the scene.
"Where are the others?" asked a medic.
"Last I knew," said the American, "the Scot was haggling price, and the Canadian was arguing that his government should pay."
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作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-13 16:59
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On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
作者: 皮皮鲁 时间: 2011-4-13 17:00
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
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