每天讲个英语幽默故事(接力) 英语, 幽默, 故事, 接力

simonpapers

在放松中学习英语是大家的追求,更是美的享受!点点英语,铸就未来^-^
Second language

　A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind a bush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.

　　Mother mouse barked fiercely, "Woof, woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for it's life.

　　Mother mouse turned to her babies and said, "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"

　　一只母老鼠带着孩子出来散步，突然她看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视耽耽。

　　母老鼠向着猫叫道：“汪，汪，汪”，猫听了非常害怕，拼命跑走了。

　　母老鼠回过头洋洋自得的对孩子说：“现在你知道外语的重要性了吧。”

simonpapers

A(衣衫褴褛）;B（衣着光鲜）C小花D小草E椅子F新闻记者
B坐在E上吃东西，A一乞丐上前
A：先生，先生，请给我些面包，谢谢，我饿得不行了。
B：（厌恶）让开，让开。（然后便起身离开，这时他的钱包掉到E上头了）
A：先生，先生（A看见后，立即拾起，追上了走远的B）
B：让开，让开啊，我没吃的了，也没钱了（看也不看A，仍自顾自地走了）
C：他真愚蠢啊
D：是啊是啊（D点头附和）
A：可……先生……您听我说……（仍拉着B衣服的后摆）
B：挖，你这人怎么这么讨厌！（还是没有回头看A一眼）
C：椅子啊，你会不会觉得刚刚坐在你身上的人特愚蠢？
E：唉，人总是这么愚蠢啊~~~~
D：是啊是啊
与此同时A与B还在纠缠，这时E终于隐忍不住爆发了。
E：先生！你的钱包丢了！你怎么这么傻啊。
A与B同时回头，看见了那会说话的椅子E，吓昏过去了。这一幕恰巧被经过的F看见了。于是F就报道了这一事件。
F：大家好，我是新闻记者F，今天我看见了一个奇异的现象，一个椅子说话了，两个人被吓昏了，下面我将采访一下被吓昏的两个人。
B：哦，上帝，哦，妈妈。
F：这个人傻了，我们不鸟他了，下面我采访一下另一个人吧，请问你为什么不告诉他，他的钱包丢了？
A：对不起，我不知道“钱包”这个单词怎么讲……
F：通过这一事件，我们可以认识到，掌握一门外语的重要性，以及金钱给人类带来的影响。是吗，椅子？
E：是啊，是啊（E傻傻地拼命点头）
C：唉，人可真愚蠢，椅子也被他们弄傻了。
D：谁让这是一个童话呢……

A: sir , sir, please give me a piece of bread. thank you, sir. I'm hungry to die.
B :get away, get away, dirty man.
A: sir , sir!!
B: run away, please run away .I have no food, and I don't have money, either.
C:hey,xiao D,he is so foolish,isn't he?
D:yes,yes
A:but....sir....please listen to me.....
B:wa,why are you so disgusting!!
C:hey,chair,do you feel the man sat on you a moment ago is very stupid.
E:ai,pretty flower,do you know,men are always very silly.
D:yes,yes!!
E:sir!you lost your wallet!can't you be more clever?
F:good morning,everybody.I'm a jonrnist F. Today I saw a very weird thing--a chair open her mouth,and two men are frightened to faint.now,I will intenview the two nozzy man
B:wo,my god,wo,my,mum
F:I'm sorry to tell you this man has been mad.we needn't take notice of him.let me interview the other man,hello,man,can you tell men why didn't you tell him he lost his wallet?
A:I'm sorry,I don't know how to speak "钱包" in english......
F:dear audience,through this thing we can learn that how improtant it is to mastery a foreign language,and how lagre the money affect us.is that all right,chair?
E:yes,yes.
C:ai,men is so silly.
D:don't believe us,it is just a fairly tale.

simonpapers

伊索寓言——蚂蚁和蚱蜢-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：  

  On a cold, frosty day an ant was dragging out some of the corn which he had laid up in the summertime, to dry it .A grasshopper, half perished with hunger, besought the ant to give him a morsel of to preserve his life. "What were you doing, "said the ant, "this last summer ?""Oh,"said the grasshopper,"I was not idle .I kept singing all the summer long ."said the ant, laughing and shutting up his granary ."Since you could sing all summer, you may dance all winter."
  Winter finds out what summer lays by.


译文：

在寒冷，结霜的天气，一只蚂蚁拖曳出一些夏天储存起来的玉米，想晾干。一只蚱蜢，饿的要死，恳求蚂蚁给他一些食物让他保住性命。蚂蚁说："那你整个夏天在干什么？"蚱蜢说："我并不闲着，我整个夏天都在歌唱。"蚂蚁笑着关闭了他的谷仓，说："你可以在整个夏天歌唱，那你也可能整个冬天都跳舞。"
冬天都找出夏天在干什么？

词汇：

laid up 储存

a morsel of 一些，些许

granary 谷仓

simonpapers

伊索寓言——口渴的乌鸦-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：  

A crow, ready to die with thirst, flew with joy to a pitcher which he saw at a distance. But when he came up to it, he found the water so low that with all his stooping and straining he was unable to reach it. Thereupon he tried to bread the pitcher, then to overturn it, seeing some small pebbles at hand, he dropped a great many of them, one by one, into the pitcher, and so raised the water to the brim, and quenched his thirst.
Skill and patience will succeed where force fails necessity is the mother of invention.

译文：

一只快渴死的乌鸦，远远地看见一只水壶，就高兴地飞了过去，但是当他飞到的时候发现壶里的水浅得怎么用力弯腰伸颈也够不着，于是他试着把水壶打破，又试着把他推倒。但是力量不足，都做不到，最后看见近边有许多小石子，他一个个地把很多石子丢进了水壶，这样使水上升到壶口，就解了渴。
在体力做不到的时候，技巧和耐心会帮助人成功，需要是发明之母。

词汇：

with all his stooping and straining 用尽一切力量弯腰伸颈

simonpapers

伊索寓言——狐狸和乌鸦-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：   

    A crow had snatched a goodly piece of cheese out of a window, and flew with it into a high tree, intent on enjoying her prize. A fox spied the dainty morsel, and thus he planned his approaches, "Oh, crow, "said he, "how beautiful are thy wings ! how bright thine eye! How graceful thy neck! Thy breast is the breast of an eagle ! thy claws-I beg pardon-thy talons, are a match for all the beasts for the field, oh, that such a bird should be dumb, and want only a voice."the crow, pleased with the flattery, and chuckling to think how she would surprise the fox with her caw, opened her mouth. Down dropped the cheese! Snapping it up, the fox observed, as he walked away, that whatever he had remarked of her beauty, he had said nothing yet of her brains.
    Men seldom flatter without some private end in view, and they who listen to such music may expect to have to pay the piper.

译文：

    一只乌鸦从一个窗户里叼出了一快相当大的干酪，飞上了一棵高数，一心想享享口福，吃掉她夺来的这快东西，一只狐狸发现了这块美味的食物，就计划去接近她，"哦，乌鸦"他说，"你的翅膀多么漂亮啊！你的眼睛多么明亮啊，你的脖子多么娇美！你的胸脯和鹰一样！你的爪子，请原谅我，你的铁爪足以和所有的野兽对抗，哦，多么可惜，这样一只鸟竟是一只哑巴，只缺少一副喉咙了！"乌鸦听了这甜言蜜语，心理很高兴，他得意地心里想，如果我哇哇地叫起来将使狐狸感到多么惊奇，于是他就张开了嘴。干酪拍地掉下去了！狐狸叼起干酪，一边走开，一边批评地说，不论他怎么吹嘘她的美貌，可是他还没谈论他的智慧。
    谄媚人的人很少是没有自私打算的，而倾听这种音乐的人则势必要出钱。

词汇：

snatched 抢夺

a goodly piece of 相当大一块

spied 侦察出，发现

dainty morsel 好吃的东西

thy 你的（古语）

thine 你的（古语）

a match for ……的对手

flattery 奉承

chuckling 暗自得意

Snapping it up 猛地咬住

in view 企望

to pay the piper 负担费用，承担代价

simonpapers

伊索寓言——虚荣的八哥-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识
原文：

A jackdaw, as vain and conceited as jackdaw could be, picked up the feathers which some peacocks had shed, stuck them amongst his own, and despising his old companions, introduced himself with the greatest assurance into a flock of those beautiful birds .They, instantly detecting the intruder, stripped him of his borrowed plumes, and falling upon him with their beaks sent him about his business .The unlucky jackdaw, sorely punished and deeply sorrowing, betook himself to his former companions, and would have flocked with them again as if nothing had happened .But they, recollecting what airs he had given himself, drummed him out of their society, while one of those whom he had so lately despised, read him this lecture ："Had you been contented with what nature made you, you would have escaped the chastisement of you r betters and also the contempt of you r equals。”

译文：

一只自负到极点的八哥鸟，捡起了一些孔雀脱落下来的羽毛，插在自己的羽毛中，于是就看不起自己的老伙伴了，满怀信心地走到了那些美丽的鸟群中。他们立刻发觉了这个闯进来的家伙，拔掉了他身上捡来的羽毛，并且用嘴啄他，把他赶了出去，不幸的八哥受到了严重的惩罚，感到非常难过，于是又去投奔自己的老伙伴，满想若无其事地又和他们混在一起，但是他们想起了过去他那副骄傲自大的神气就把他从队伍中轰了出来，不久以前曾受过他轻视的一个伙伴教训他说："如果你过去满足于你自己的天生模样，你就不会受到比你美的人的惩罚，也不会受到跟你相同的人的鄙视了。"


词汇：

vain 虚荣的，徒劳的

jackdaw 八哥，寒鸦

peacock 孔雀

with the greatest assurance 满怀信心地

falling upon 攻击

sent him about his business 把他赶出去

drummed...out 逐出

read him this lecture 教训他

chastisement 惩罚

simonpapers

伊索寓言——狐狸和山羊-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识
原文：

  A fox had fallen into a well, and had been casting about for a long time how he should get out again, when at length a goat came to the place, and wanting to drink, asked Reynard whether the water was good, and of there was plenty of it .The fox, dissembling the real danger of his case, replied :"come down, my friend, the water is so good that I can not drink enough of it, and so aboundant that it can not be exhausted ."Upon this the goat without any more ado leaped in, when the fox, taking advantage of his friend's horns, as nimbly leaped out, and coolly remarked to the poor deluded goat :"if you had half as much brains as you have beard, you would have looked before you leaped."

译文：

一只狐狸掉在一口井里，转了很久怎样再跳上去，最后一只山羊来到这里，他正想喝水，便问狐狸这水好不好，还多不多，狐狸掩饰起他的真实危险处境，回答说："下来吧，我的朋友，这水好得使我喝不够，而且多的用不完。"于是山羊立刻跳了井里，狐狸踩着他朋友的角，敏捷地跳了上去，并且冷淡地对受了骗的可怜的山羊说："如果你的脑子有你胡子一半多，你就会先思而后行了。"


词汇：

casting about 来回走，想方设法

at length 最后

Reynard 狐狸的通称

without any more ado 不费吹灰之力

taking advantage of 利用

look before you leap 三思而后行

simonpapers

伊索寓言——狐狸和葡萄-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：  

A Fox, just at the time of the vintage, stole into a vine-yard where the ripe sunny Grapes were trellised up on high in most tempting show. He made many a spring and a jump after the luscious prize, but, failing in all his attempts, he muttered as he retreated："Well what does it matter! The Grapes are sour!"

译文：

正当葡萄熟了的时候，一只狐狸偷偷地溜进了葡萄园。葡萄架上高高地挂着亮晶晶的、熟透了的葡萄，显得十分诱人。他跳了好几跳，蹦了好几蹦，想吃到这甘美的葡萄，但是他的企图全落空了，走开的时候，他自言自语说："得了！这有什么！这葡萄是酸的。"


词汇：

trellised up 用棚架支撑着

in most tempting show 最诱人的样子

simonpapers

伊索寓言——狮子和牛-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    Three bulls fed in a field together in the greatest peace and amity .A lion had long watched them in the hope of making prize of them, but found that there was little chance for him so long as they kept all together .He therefore began secretly to spread evil and slanderous reports of one against the other ,till he had formented a jealousy and distrust amongst them . No sooner did the lion see that they avoided one another ,and fed each by himself apart ,than he fell upon them ,and so made an easy prey of them all.
    The quarrels of friends are the opportunities of foes.

译文：

    有三头牛，他们极其友好和睦地在一起在野外吃草，一头狮子窥视了很久，想逮住他们，但是觉得只要他们聚在一起，就得不到机会。因此他开始暗地里散布流言蜚语，说这一个跟另一个作对，直到他们之间制造了妒忌和不信任。狮子一看到他们各奔东西、分头吃草的时候，就马上向他们一个一个的进攻了。这样他就轻而易举地把他们全吃光了。
    朋友间的不知，就是敌人进攻的机会。

词汇：

making prize of 逮住

fell upon them 向他们攻击

simonpapers

伊索寓言——豹和狐狸-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：

  A Leopard and a fox had a contest which was the finer creature of the two ,the leopard put forward the beauty of its numberless spots ,but the fox replied: "It is better to have a versatile mind than a variegated body.

译文：

    一只豹和一只狐狸在争论谁好谁不好，豹提出他有数不尽的美丽斑点，而狐狸回答说："有多方面的智力比有多种颜色的身体强。

词汇：

Leopard 猎豹

versatile 多方面的

variegated 多彩的

simonpapers

伊索寓言——熊与狐狸-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    A bear used to boast of his excessive love for man.saying that he never worried or mauled him when dead .The fox observed .with a smile :"I should have thought more of profession if you never eaat him alive ."
Better save a man from dying than slalve him when dead.

译文：

    一只熊总喜欢夸耀自己很爱人，他说人死了之后，他从来不咬他或伤害他，狐狸笑着说："假如你从来不吃活人的话，我就会更重视你所说的话了。"
    拯救一个人使他不死，胜过在他死后说些安慰的话。

simonpapers

伊索寓言——青蛙和牛-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：

  An ox, grazing in a swampy meadow, chanced to set his foot among a parcel of young frogs, and crushed nearly the whole brood to death .One that escaped ran off to his mother with the dreadful news."and ,oh ,mother !"said he ,"it was a beast -such a big four footed beast!-that did it .""Big?" quoth the old frog , "How big? Was it as big" -- and she puffed herself out to a great degree-"as big as this ?""oh!"said the little one ,"a great deal bigger than that .""well, was it so big ?"and she swelled herself out yet mere ."Indeed ,mother ,but it was ,and of you were to burst yourself you would never reach half its size."provoked at such a disparagement of her powers, the old frog made one more trial ,and burst herself indeed.
So men are ruined by attempting greatness to which they have no claim.


译文：

    一头牛在一快泥泞的草地上吃草，偶然把脚踏在一堆小青蛙当中，几乎把所有的幼蛙踩死。脱险的一个带着这可怕的消息跑到他母亲那里去了。"啊，母亲！"他说"是一只野兽-那样一只有四只脚的大野兽-踩的。""大吗？"老青蛙说。"多大？"她股足了气把自己胀得大大的说："他像这样的吗？""啊！"小 青蛙说，"比那大多了。""哦，有这么大吗？"她鼓着气胀地更大了。"真的，母亲，但确实如此，即使你胀破了自己，也不够他一半大。"老青蛙看到自己的力气受到轻视很是激怒，于是又鼓了一下气，果然这次胀破了自己。
    妄自尊大的人必将自取灭亡的。

词汇：

grazing 吃草

a parcel of 一群

brood 一窝

quoth 说（古代）

puffed herself out 鼓气把自己吹大

disparagement 轻视

simonpapers

伊索寓言——龟兔赛跑-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

  A hare jeered at a tortoise for the slowness of his pace .But he laughed ,and said that he would run against her and beat her any day she would name ."Come on ," said the hare ,"you will soon see what my feet are made of ."So it was agreed that they should start at once .The tortoise went off jogging along ,without a moment's stopping ,at his usual steady pace .The hare treating the whole matter very lightly ,said he would first take a little nap ,and that she should soon overtake the tortoise .Meanwhile ,the tortoise plodded on ,and the hare ,oversleeping herself ,arrived at the goal ,only to see that the tortoise had got in before her .
Slow and steady wins the race.


译文：

    兔子嘲笑乌龟的步子爬的慢，但是他笑了，说总有一天他会和她赛跑，并且赢他。"快点"，兔子说，"你很快会看到我是跑的多么的快。"他们打算马上就开始比赛。乌龟拼命的爬，一刻都不停止，兔子认为比赛太轻松了，他说他先打个盹，然后很快的可以追上乌龟。同时乌龟坚持爬行，当兔子醒来跑到的时候只能看着乌龟在他前面到达终点。
    稳扎稳打终能胜利。

词汇：

jeer at 嘲笑

tortoise 乌龟

go off 离开

usual steady pace 平时的稳定的步伐

over-take 超过，赶上

plod on 沉重地向前

simonpapers

伊索寓言——狼与鹤-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识

原文：

    A Wolf had got a bone stuck in his throat and in the greatest agony ran up and down, beseeching every animal he met to relieve him, at the same time hinting at a very handsome reward to the successful operator. A Crane, moved by his entreaties and promises, ventured her long neck down the Wolf's throat, and drew out the bone. She then modestly for the promised reward. To which the Wolf, grinning and showing his teeth, replied with seeming indignation: "Ungreateful creature! to ask for any other reward than that you have put you head into a wolf's jaws and brought it safe again!"

    Those who are charitable only in the hope of a return must not be surprised if in their dealings with evil men, they meet with more jeers than thanks.

词汇：

in the great agony 极其痛苦

with seeming indignation 充满怒气

hinting at 暗示

simonpapers

伊索寓言——老鬣狗-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Hound, who had been excellent one in his time, and had done good service to his master in the field, at length become worn out with the weight of years and trouble. One day, when hunting the wild boar, he seized the creature by the ear, but his teeth giving way, he was forced to let go his hold, and the boar escaped. Upon this the huntsman, coming up, severely rate him. But the feeble Dog replied: "Spare your old servant! it was the power not not the will that failed me. Remember rather what I was, than abuse me for what I am.

词汇：

in his time 想当年
at length 后来，最后
worn out 累垮了
the weight of years and trouble 长年劳累
seized ... by the ear 咬住 ... 的耳朵
give way 让步

simonpapers

伊索寓言——狼和羊-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Wolf that had been bitten by a Dog, and was in a very sad case, being unable to move, called to a Sheep that was passing by, and begged her to fetch him some water from the neighboring stream. "For if you," said he, "will bring me drink, I will find meat myself." "Yes," said the Sheep, "I make no doubt of it; for, if I come near enough to give you the drink, you will soon make mince-meat of me."

词汇：

make no doubt of it 毫不怀疑

make mince-meat of me> 拿我当肉吃

simonpapers

伊索寓言——鹅与鹤-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    Some Geese and some Cranes fed together in the same field. One day the sportsmen came suddenly down upon them. The Cranes being light of body, flew off in a moment; but the geese, weighted down by their fat, were all taken.

    In civil commotions, they fare best who have least to fetter them.

词汇：

geese 鹅（复数)

crane 鹤

come suddenly down upon 突然袭击

weighted down 过重而坠

have least to fetter> 最少牵挂

simonpapers

伊索寓言——母狮子-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识
原文：

    There was a great stir made among all the Beasts, which could boast of largest family. So they came to the Lioness. "And how many," said , "do you have at a birth?" "One," said she, grimly, "but that one is a lion."

    Quality comes before quantity.

译文：

    一场大比拼在所有野兽中展开了，看看谁敢夸耀自己的家族最大。众野兽来到母狮子跟前，问道：“你一胎能生产几个？”“一个”，狮子凶横地说，“但那是一头狮子”。
    质量重于数量。

词汇：

stir 轰动，骚动

boast of    自夸

at a birth 一胎

grimly 冷酷地，可怕地
v

simonpapers

伊索寓言——鹰和箭-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  

原文：

    A Bowman took aim at an Eagle and hit him in the heart. As the Eagle turned his head in the agonies of death, he saw that the Arrow was winged with his own feathers. "How much sharper," said he, "are the wounds made by weapons which we ourselves have supplied!"

词汇：

bowman 弓箭手
took aim at 瞄准
in the agonies of death 疼得死去活来
was winged 配箭翎
sharper （疼痛）更剧烈

simonpapers

伊索寓言——大山分娩-小说寓言
[来 源] 学知识  
原文：

    In days of yore, a mighty runmbling was heard in a mountain. It was said to be in labor, and multitudes flocked together, from far and near, to see what it would produce. After long expectation and many wise conjectures from the by-standers -- out popped a Mouse!

    The story applies those magnificent promises end in a paltry performance.

译文：

    古时候，在一座山里发出了一阵隆隆巨响，据说这是大山要临产了。人群从四面八方聚集起来，观看大山会生出什么后代。大家企盼了许久，并且作了许多聪明的推测，结果从那里跳出一只老鼠。
这个故事说的是，雷声大，雨点小。

词汇：

In days of yore 古时候

in labor 临产

multitudes flocked together 人群聚集

by-standers 旁观者

out popped 跳出

paltry 微不足道的