Melissa N., then 23, had been waiting for the right time to break up with her boyfriend of fouryears when he casually proposed to her back in 2006. It seemed every time she tried to endthings with him, her boyfriend would receive some type of bad news ― a health problem wouldarise or there'd be a family emergency ― that would force her to put it off a bit longer.
"Then on our way to Walmart one day, in my mother's car because we couldn't afford our own, he leaned toward the window and looked at me with one hand on the wheel," Melissa, whoselast name has been withheld to protect her privacy, told HuffPost. "He said, 'What do youthink, this time next year we'll get married?'"
Melissa was completely shocked ― "but not in a good way." "I sat quietly for what felt likeforever thinking of how embarrassing the situation was and how angry I was that he hadasked," she said.
Melissa asked him if he was serious. He confirmed that he was. "He said that we'd beentogether long enough and it was probably about time," she told HuffPost. "I can't rememberexactly what I said but it was along the lines of, 'We'll see.' I was panicking on the insidethinking about how I could actually dump him."
Melissa ended the relationship a month later. "I knew I couldn't spend my life with him," shesaid. It's not easy to respond to anmarriage proposal on the spot, particularly one you didn'tsee coming, as was the case with Melissa. But in an ideal world, the best time to have theconversation with your partner about your feelings on marriage is before the proposal evergoes down.
"Proposals can definitely catch a girl or guy off guard but more often than not, the idea ofmarriage is something you have already discussed," etiquette expert Amber Harrison toldHuffPost.
